Missing You!

Oh how I miss this space, this time to write, and YOU!

There is much to share, but the thing that is on my mind at the moment is this:

HBear is Pregnant.

Her mom has been talking to my mom. She doesn't know who the father is. It is really sad.

If there is one thing I regret from when HBear lived with us it is that I didn't champion the birth control implant enough. I wanted her to make her own choices, and own those decisions, so I let the process move at a speed that was too slow, and it didn't happen before she went home.

She was doing so well too. Got her act together to prove everyone wrong and graduate from high school. Got herself a job at a local grocer, one that includes benefits and pays a low but livable wage. Repaired the relationship with her mom and was even paying rent to live at home. Bought herself a car. She was on a really good path. 

So now I am looking for a some advice about how to reach out to her. And how to bring up the topic of adoption with her. I want to show the appropriate level of excitement about the announcement, but also am very aware that her circumstances are less than ideal. I want to be sure that she knows what her options are, and still express confidence in her ability to succeed in whatever choice she makes. Any insight, thoughts, suggestions would be SO appreciated.


meg said...


Amber said...

That is tough. Are you interested in adopting this one if she's willing? She's made that difficult decision once before so at least she knows she's strong enough to do it.

Augusta said...

So good to see a post from you, Foxy. I can't imagine how busy life is for you, these days (but I'm about to find out, with my own version of working and parenting).
It must be hard to hear that Hbear is pregnant for a number of reasons. I hope that you can have a good discussion with her when the time is right. It sounds like it may be a matter of opening up the door for her to talk about her experience, and you'll see where she is at regarding the pregnancy. I would take her lead.

Ladybug Baby said...

Wow. I remember when she moved in with you guys. You were so awesome taking her in and being parental without being too parental. I am so shocked by the news. Ugh! I don't think you can really push her one way or the other here, but I would try to be supportive and available to her to talk about what she's thinking.

Dr. Grumbles said...

I am a psychologist and a blogger (http://docgrumbles.wordpress.com). I am currently conducting a survey of bloggers who post about pregnancy, fertility, adoption, pregnancy loss, and parenting. I would like to extend an invitation for you to complete the brief survey found here:
(I am very sorry to leave this in a comment like a spammer!)
Thank you so much!
Dr. Grumbles


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