Due Date!

December 9th.
This is the day that we've been waiting for. Give or take a few weeks, that is!
The Foxy Baby is officially due today.

I'd planned to work right up until I went into labor, HA! Last Friday I decided that enough was enough and called it my last day in the office. I thought that I'd work from home this week, but it hasn't actually played out like that. I saw my GP on Wednesday and she officially signed me out of work on disability. (Can you see me smiling?)

ML had a very big interview on Wednesday. Out of town, for a project that could keep him gainfully employed for the next few years. His team was one of 6 who got shortlisted for interviews. 4 teams will be selected to have the work divided up among them. He feels really good about the interview and our fingers are crossed. Its been a rough few years for his industry, but we've managed. This would really be the most awesome thing if he gets this job. He'd be working from home, with periodic meetings in the city where the project is located, which happens to be one of our most favorite cities to visit. Please cross your fingers.

I am feeling more and more pregnant every day. More aches. More tired. More emotional. More ready to meet this baby. I haven't been sleeping very well at night, which means that I am tired during the day, but too uncomfortable to nap. Usually a hot bath will give me some temporary relief from the aches, but when I am tired nothing seems to help. I emerged from the bath on Tuesday in tears feeling so overwhelmed. I gave in on Wedensday night and took a sleeping pill which seems to have helped tremendously. My midwife encouraged us to have sleeping pills on hand to be sure that I am well rested when we go into labor - smart lady :)

The house is ready. The fridge is full. We picked up the birth tub yesterday. The bed is made up with multiple layers of sheets and plastic mattress covers. Plans are in place for HBear to go stay with my mom. I even have birth announcements mocked up and ready to go with labels printed.

I am excited. Feeling really positive about going into labor and being able to birth this baby. But also knowing that I am going to be so sad to not be pregnant any more. I've loved everything about the way that my body has grown and changed, the feelings of a little creature in my stomach, the way that people look at me, I've loved it all. Its been everything that I imagined it to me and so much more. I feel so lucky for the chance to have experienced this.

I've also done a lot of thinking about our plans for more. I'd always been so sure that I wanted a big family with ML - 3, maybe 4 kids. When it became clear that it wasn't going to be easy ML was clear that he'd be happy with one, if I insisted that we pursue treatment. I couldn't imagine the thought of only having 1, of an only child. However these past few months have changed my thinking. I feel so grateful that we are actually having this child. I'm not sure that I want to go thru everything again. I'm not sure that I want to expose my family to the rollercoaster of hope and grief that goes hand in hand with treatment.

Thinking that I might never be pregnant again, that I might never experience these belly kicks and bladder jabs, its an emotional jumble of gratitude and sadness, of love and loss. I suppose that we will cross that bridge when the time comes. We do have two frozen embryos, but at this moment in time, I am at peace with the thought that this is it.

So I sit here today, on Foxy Baby's due date, rocking my hips my birth ball, savoring every last minute of being pregnant, every last ache and pain, and waiting with anticipation for a sign that this little one is ready to meet its family. We are ready for you baby.

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13 comments :

Kakunaa said...

I am not going to lie...I am incredibly jealous that you made it to term. And I completely understand the only 1 thing. While pregnant I felt the same way...but then after he came...yeah...if we try again the family won't know until after. Love you!

E and R said...

Fingers are crossed that ML gets the job!! What a blessing that would be. Hope foxy baby doesn't keep you waiting too much longer, I know how excited you are to meet him/her! Thinking of you!

Rach said...

Excited to hear about Baby Fox's arrival!

Augusta said...

I'm really hoping that ML gets the contract. It would put your mind at greater peace regarding finances. And a peaceful mind is good for a new mama. Hoping also that the baby arrives after his big presentation. But I guess the baby will be on his or her own schedule. You're in my thoughts, dear Foxy.

Lauren said...

I can't wait for you to have your little one!!! Your posts really bring me back to when I was pregnant.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like awesome news all around. I can't wait to read the arrival post - it's right around the corner!! :)

Kerrik said...

Sorry you have been so uncomfy, but yay for being so close and having everything ready!

Fluffy said...

Im so glad you have had a healthy 9 months. Cant wait to see the pics of the little one! xxx
Hope everything goes well xxxx

Anonymous said...

It is finally here! I can't believe the whole 9 months has gone by already. I can't even imagine how excited you must be feeling right now.

kkwg said...

Looking forward to the next installment! :) I'll be patient, though...

Anonymous said...

Exciting! I hope that Foxy Baby make's their appearance soon and that you have a smooth birth. My fingers are crossed for ML to get the job.

Emms said...

I am so excited, hoping that we get to read good news soon! Big hugs mama!

Brenda said...

Fingers crossed for ML. And good luck to you, I.can't wait to here a about the next chapter in you lives!

 

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