My Foxy Family

Someday a family. Someday a yard littered with toys. Someday the sweet pure love of a child. Someday the loving embrace of my husband with a little one tucked inside. Someday a Christmas Card with our family picture. Someday. My Someday is now.

falling apart.

It's all falling apart. Tonight he told me that if I couldn't accept and love him, including his drinking, that I could move out. ...

Feeling SO MUCH Better

I spent this morning reading back through my posts of the past couple months. The timeline was much longer in my head, and I was thankful ...

Shopping for Plus-Sized clothing Sucks

I will be attending a few high profile events next week that require me to wear professional attire. Normally this would be a challenge, b...

Regrets, Requests, Appreciations

AMENDS/REGRETS I want to make amends for: holding so much anger feeling so much betrayal about your decision to drink again. the fac...

Asking for Too Much

What do I need Right Now? I need to be heard. I need to feel like I have an ally, someone on my side. I need to not be stuck i...

Fatalistic Thinking - on Mother's Day no less.

I cried the whole way to celebrate Mother's Day yesterday. It was a long drive, about an hour. It wasn't that I am not grateful fo...

space to be devistated

SO I'm in this 'intensive outpatient hospital' program because I had what can best be described as a nervous breakdown aft...

Giving as Addiction

My assignment yesterday was to answer a series of questions intended to get at the underlying issues of why we participate in addictive beh...

Cognitive Distortions -top 5, i mean 7.

My homework this last weekend was to identify the top five cognitive distortions I identify with and write about them. The Distortions th...

The Mountains

We made it to the mountains. I wanted it but didn't believe it would actually happen. But here I am, sitting on the deck, listening t...

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